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Teacher’s Phobias

Redundaphobia – the fear that, even outside of school, you will begin repeating everything you say three times to make sure others understand.

Sneakasnackaphobia – the fear a student will surreptitiously eat a candy bar in your classroom and find out, quite by accident, that he has a peanut allergy.

Paperpilephobia – fear that if you don’t put off all of that paperwork from the office, they’ll think you have plenty of time to do nothing but their paperwork.

Coldandfluaphobia – the fear that every virus that enters your classroom is looking specifically for you.

Atontogradeaphobia – the fear that every single student will turn in a project two hours before your grades are due.

Chickenpattaphobia – the fear that the three-week-old chicken-patty-on-a-bun under the heat lamp in the school cafeteria will be yours on the day you forget your lunch.

Budgetcutaphobia – the fear that the next published set of school budget cuts will include a photo of you.

Infinitaphobia – the fear that the faculty meeting that seems endless really is.

Applicaphobia – the fear that the student you’ve been urging to apply himself to his work will instead apply himself to making your life miserable for the rest of the year.

Lovasubaphobia – the fear that everyone at school will like your substitute teacher more than they like you.

Achapteraheadaphobia – the fear that your students will learn the material faster than you can plan the lessons.

Gottagoaphobia – the fear that the coffee that keeps you alert will also keep you dancing around for the last twenty minutes of class.

Adminlistaphobia – the fear that the stupid chain joke you just sent to a colleague was actually accidentally sent to every administrator in the school district.

Typographophobia – the fear that the newsletter on grammar and spelling that you sent home includes a number of misspelled words and punctuation errors.

Observatiophobia – the fear that you’ll discover in the middle of your administrator-observed class that you’ve planned a twenty-minute lesson for an eighty-minute class.

Desksquishaphobia – the fear that the student desks that are migrating closer to the front of the classroom every day will eventually crush you against the whiteboard.

Theyllbebackaphobia - the fear that the worst behaved kids will be the ones that won't pass to the next grade.

2 comentarios:

  1. Teachers are like actors because "we are always on the stage".

    Others think they are like orchestral conductors
    "because we direct conversation and set the pace and tone".

    Others feel like gardeners, "because we plant the seeds and then watch them grow".

  2. "I've come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It's my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or de-humanized."
    (Dr. H. Ginott)